Tears

Has love been thrown down under the curved needs of lust? Bending toward the needs of others, and the very laws of attraction, I have laid down the rigor of some new beginning to honor conviction – unsure forms of responsibility. It was another necessary experience to expose the vein, its familiar repetition and codependencies. Another love; Intensely valid, absolutely brief, and another final visitation called the desolation of some hope. So again, I have wept and need the tears. It’s the storm above that speaks the needs below, within, the undying thirst of life. Tears are charged like yesterday’s red weather. I witnessed the storm’s lightening – symbolic scars of a wounded heart. It never really heals. It learns to live with its scars and lets their history speak through new encounters. The hope is with the history, the learning, the bending, stretching, the mourning for differences. So we cry. The faces of people without tears is absolutely tragic. If you pay close attention to pain you can see it. Their tears are forcibly repressed and their faces full of jealousy and full of pain. Years of contortions – years and years of unacknowledged sadness, years of hemming stone around their hearts. More drugs please. More substitutes – “Fill in for me a moment; Let me settle, and all that is striving for conscientization… Let it become unconscious again.” – this is the mass appeal and the steady practice of identities forged from capital relations. The message: “Tears are not productive; tears are weak; tears are dangerous.”

In tears the pain flows forth in messages – fuck the self, the becoming, the evolution – and still I celebrate the feeling because it is real and it is me. The scripture was with me recently: my tears turn to laughter. Its a well-spring of humanity. In that release healing is a part of me and God draws near – I draw near to God. I put God on. Tears create space for the active imagination to offer the unconscious an opportunity to meet the self – for a compromise, a compensation. I’ve heard, “Pain is the touchstone of spiritual growth.” So grow.

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